Faith Alone is Enough

A few days ago, there was a shooting at an elementary school. 20 children and 6 adults were killed. Absolutely horrific. As the days have passed, I have pondered a lot about this incident. I cried, I held my baby even tighter, I felt the fear of raising him in such a broken world... And I know others are pondering on this day as well. Many people may wonder why a loving Heavenly Father would allow such a tragedy to occur. It is an easy thought to have when something so cruel and unfair happens.

My thoughts about that question are these. We were sent here to this life to be tested. How can we prove ourselves if we never have an opportunity to exercise our faith? How can we serve others if no one ever needs help? How can we learn optimism and gratitude if we never experience loss?

So then some may ask, if trials are necessary in life, why are some people's lives so much harder than others? This is a question I myself have pondered many times. I get the adversity thing, and the need to exercise our agency. But it does seem like some have been dealt a much worse hand than others. Then I remembered how uniquely individual we all are. So our trials must be cut out according to that uniqueness. It would hardly be fair to give us all the same test when we all have different traits to build and different qualities to prove. And it would hardly be a test of faith if everyone else went through the exact same thing. The point is for us to build a personal relationship with God - our own testimony based on our unique experiences in this life - and to choose for ourselves how to respond to the trials we face.

My comfort in times like this is to remember that there is so much good in the world amidst all of the evil. At Christmas time especially, we see people's desires to serve come out. Families are breaking, but they are also being created. People are hurting, but so many are also being comforted and loved. Lives are being destroyed, but so many others are building their talents and having adventures. There is evil in the world, but we must not let that dismiss from our minds the fact that there is also good.

I know my logic is not enough to satisfy some people who are discouraged by this event (or others like it), and that is okay. I do not have all of the answers.  My purpose in writing this entry is that this logic is enough for me. I have accepted that my mortal brain cannot comprehend all of the mysteries of Heaven, and I will never fully understand Heavenly Father's plan while I am here. But I do fully understand that He knows his plan, and his plan is perfect. So in times when logic falters, and pain is strong, I rely solely on my faith that God lives, he knows each of us, and he loves us. When faith is all we have, we exercise it by accepting that faith alone is enough.

My prayers go out to all those affected by this tragedy in any way.  May you find comfort and peace during this time of hardship.

Happy Sunday!

Sometimes I just need reminders.  What to focus on, what really matters in the long run, what I am aiming toward in life... It is so easy to get off track in the jumble of life that is this world.  Here's some words of wisdom to keep my perspective in check.  Enjoy :)

- "Believe in yourselves.  Believe in your capacity to do some good in this world.  God sent us here for a purpose, and that was to improve the world in which we live.  The wonderful thing is that we can do it."                                                              
                                                                 -Gordon B. Hinckley

- "Promise yourself to be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.  Look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.  Think only of the best, work only for the best, and expect only the best.  Forget the mistakes of the past and move on to the greater achievements of the future.  Give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.  Live in the faith that the whole world is on your side so long as you are true to the best that is in you."
                                                                 -Christian D. Larson

- "What you are is God's gift to you; what you make of yourself is your gift to God."
                                                                 -Jewish Proverb

- "I can say without hesitation that you can have a perfect brightness of hope for your future and endless joy if you press forward as righteous children of God."
                                                                 -James E. Faust

- "When you look in the dictionary for the most important word...it could be "remember," because all of you have made covenants...our greatest need is to remember."
                                                                 -Spencer W. Kimball

- "When we put God first, all other things fall into their proper place or drop out of our lives.  Our love of the Lord will govern the claims for our affection, the demands on our time, the interests we pursue, and the order of our priorities."
                                                                 -Ezra Taft Benson

- "Happiness is a grateful heart."

- "The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.  Let us move forward with strong and active faith."
                                                                 -Franklin D. Roosevelt

- "But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law."
                                                                 -Galatians 5:22-23

- "Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want, but the realization of how much you already have."
                                                                 -Anonymous

- "Men and women who turn their lives over to God will discover that he can make a lot more out of their lives than they can.  He will deepen their joys, expand their vision, quicken their minds, strengthen their muscles, lift their spirits, multiply their blessings, increase their opportunities, comfort their souls, raise up friends, and pour out peace."
                                                                -Ezra Taft Benson


On this Sabbath day, let's take a moment to "remember," be "grateful," be "content," "press forward," have "faith," "believe in ourselves," and "turn our lives over to God."  There's a recipe for a happy life :)  Happy Sunday everybody!

Lessons to Live By: Words of the Prophets

Did you LOVE General Conference?!  I did.  It was fabulous.  Brock and I spent the weekend in Salt Lake with the Thompson Clan and it was wonderful.  Here are some of the important lessons I learned from this session:

- To paraphrase Pres. Ucthdorf:  If you're being mean, STOP IT!  :-) 

- The Church is not synonymous to the Gospel.  It is more important to be active in the gospel, but that activity can be supported by activity in the church.

- Elder Oaks reminded us that we owe everything we have to our Savior, so we must dedicate everything we have and do to his Eternal purposes.

- I noticed a lot of themes about overcoming adversity, letting go of the past, and moving forward.  We are never alone or unloved.

- I liked Elder Scott's point about keeping our bodies healthy so we are better able to serve the Lord.  There's some motivation to exercise!  Ha ha ha :-)

- Ask yourself this question:  "What thinks Jesus of me?"  And if you don't like the answer, change it.

- President Monson's talk was a powerful reminder of why we are really here.  "We enter mortality with the power to think and to achieve. . . We were sent here with a way to return home."  I loved that.  We need to slow down and focus on what really matters in life.

Conference is such a precious gift we have.  In Primary the other day, we were talking about following the Prophet.  We gave examples of prophets such as Moses and Elijah, and talked about how the people were blessed for following their words.  We have the opportunity to listen to a prophet just like Moses and Elijah, in the comfort of our homes, every 6 months.  I think it's important to not take that precious time for granted, but to listen to the guidance that is so readily available to us.  I am so grateful to be a part of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and I know that, no matter what our lives, situations, or beliefs, the words we hear from the prophets are excellent lessons to live by!

Happy New Year!

Well, now that I am a college graduate (booyah!), I have more time during the day to do things like, blog!  So here I am, blogging about the holidays.  A little late, but better that than never, right?

Stephanie and Jeremy Dowse (my sister and brother-in-law) came up to spend New Years with us in Logan, and it was so much fun!  We had a delicious dinner of little barbecue smokeys, pineapple, rolls, gingerbread cookies, and lots and LOTS of candy!  It was great.  We played Clue, and Dance Central for the Kinect, and watched old home videos of me and Steph as little kids, and had a total blast!

When midnight came around, we made New Years Hats and ran around outside banging pots and pans.  I swear we were the only ones in the whole neighborhood celebrating New Year's;  the whole place was totally dark and silent!  So we made even more noise, to make up the difference :)  Here's some pictures of our extravaganza!

We brought in the new year by going around in a circle and naming a memory from 2011, something we learned, and a New Year's Resolution.  We drank Martinelli's to each person's answer :)  It was a lot of fun!  My previous post, 2011 in Review , lists all of my favorite memories of 2011, and I have blogged throughout the year (namely in these 4: Walk By Faith , Love Yourself , Of Things That Matter Most , and Priorities ) about different things I have learned.  If I were to try and sum up those things I've learned into a brief statement, I would say:

We were not sent here to Earth to be perfect, nor to have perfect lives.  We were sent here to learn, prioritize, and walk by faith.  Life does not always go as planned, because we need opportunities to strengthen relationships with those we love, and to turn to God.  Heavenly Father loves us, and only He knows the true path to lead us back to Him.  It is by patience with ourselves, love towards others, and faith in Him that we can find that path and be happy.

2011 was overall a pretty tough year, but I learned so many things that I never would have otherwise, and for that, I am grateful.  Here's to new goals, new resolutions, new achievements, new starts, and wonderful friends and family.  I am so blessed.  Happy New Year everybody.  Welcome, 2012 :)

Walk By Faith

"To find one's own personal relationship with Heavenly Father, to never doubt that he guides the details of our lives, to be able in life's conflict to say, 'Thy will be done,' is the attaining of the ability to walk by faith.  This ability is something that each soul must find in his own way through the creative living - out of any and all trying experiences that may come along."

                                    - Sister Stella Oaks (Mother of Dallin H. Oaks)


This quote is very comforting to me today as I cope with a very recent trial in my life.  I was 12 weeks pregnant with our first child.  Last night I began feeling some severe pain and, well I won't share the details, but after meeting with the Doctor this morning we learned that we are no longer going to have a baby this summer...

I had a good meltdown, lots of tears last night and this morning.  Brock was able to give me a blessing last night that filled us both with an overwhelming feeling of peace.  I know without a doubt that my Father in Heaven is looking out for us and he knows what is best.  For whatever reason, this is an experience that needed to happen in our lives in order to strengthen our faith.  I am positive that it will serve as a strength to me later in my life.  It is definitely painful, but we have felt much strength from our loving and supportive family.  I know that there are thousands of families in the world who have gone through this painful experience, and my heart goes out to all of them.

We would greatly appreciate any prayers in our behalf, and we want to thank everyone who has shown so much kindness and love to us both during pregnancy and now as we struggle through this new turn in our lives.  I have confidence that we will eventually be blessed with children, and that this is just a trial along the way to help us "attain the ability to walk by faith."

Truth.

This weekend was LDS General Conference.  We had two days chucked full of amazing servants of the Lord telling us what we can do to improve our lives.  My highlights:

- Social Media?!  A theme throughout all of the talks!  We have these amazing tools for connecting and reaching out to people; it's easier than it's ever been.  Twitter, Facebook, Texting, Email, Video Chat, Mormon.org, LinkedIn, Google Plus, Blogs...  We should use them to spread the amazing joy of the Gospel to others.  Service and missionary work has never been so convenient!  Yay for the church being up with the times in technology!

- Stand constant and fearless.  I noticed a huge theme about the growing chasm between the standards of the world and the standards of the Lord.  We cannot stay in luke-warm water, in between the good and the bad.  We must make a decision to stand for what is right and resist the temptations that surround us.  Then we must have the courage and charity to share our knowledge and happiness with others.

- Families are Forever.  I have always loved the emphasis our church places on the family, and it was definitely reiterated in conference this weekend.  We must make our family a top priority, and cut out other things in our lives that get in the way of that priority.

- Busy does not equal productive.  This talk was very special to me because this is what I have been striving to embrace for the past year.  It has been my goal to change my life so that I prioritize what is most important, and cut out the unnecessary extra responsibilities that always creep up.  We should allow ourselves enough time to be well rested, enjoy family bonding time, grow closer to the Savior, and listen to spiritual promptings.  Sometimes we may have to cut out other responsibilities to make room for that, but I know from personal recent experience that it is so very worth it.


Those are the main things I took from conference.  Wasn't it wonderful?  Feel free to leave comments of your highlights of General Conference, I'd love to hear!  I am so very grateful to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  I know that Thomas S. Monson is a true prophet of God and receives modern revelation to guide us and help us in our every day lives.  I know that Jesus Christ lives, and that he personally knows and loves each one of us.  I am grateful to have the scriptures as such a wonderful tool to invite the spirit and peace into my life at any given moment.  I love the power of music and the wonderful spirit that hymns bring as we praise the Lord through song.  I am so grateful that I get to be with my husband, Brock, for eternity and for this wonderful church that supports us on our journey.  My name is Aubrey, and I'm blessed to be a Mormon!

Love Yourself.

Here's a perspective to consider, and some quick words of wisdom to ponder on.

We all work so hard to love others; to have compassion on them; to forgive them.  Why?  Because they are all children of God and have their own challenges and deserve to be respected and loved.  That compassion and charity is a great thing to strive for.  Now, have you ever turned that around to yourself?  You are a child of God.  You have trials and challenges every day, and you are not perfect.  Do you respect and love yourself?  Do you forgive yourself when you make mistakes?  Do you look past your flaws, your extra few pounds, your occasional mood swings, your dirty dishes in the sink, your less-than-perfect grades, your split ends in your hair that you just keep putting in a bun, your freezer/box dinners that you didn't have time to make fancy, your impossibly high-set expectations of yourself that you just don't fulfill....  Do you look past all that and see the beautiful person inside that is just trying to do the best he/she can?  You deserve to be happy.  You deserve to slow down and enjoy the blessings of life.  You are NOT expected to be perfect.  Sit down and relax, and remember what's most important to you.  Just as you constantly strive to love your neighbor, love yourself.  Exactly the way you are!

Happy Sunday!

Missionaries

So, Brock and I have a lot of close family and friends that are out serving LDS missions right now.  I just spent all morning writing to them, and I got to thinking.  I was telling my little brother that I am so happy for him that he's out serving, and that my whole life I always wanted to be a missionary, but that the Lord had a different plan for me that was just as wonderful....  his name is Brock :-)

And I kind of feel like I got to serve my own mission, here in Logan.  Right when I turned 21, the standard age for a Sister Missionary, I got called as the Relief Society President in my ward.  I served in that calling for 9 months, until Brock and I felt that it was the right time to move into a new place.  I learned so much from that calling, and I am so grateful that I had that opportunity!  And now I have a calling in the Primary, with the music, and with Activity Days!  And I feel like this is the second part of my mission.  I am a firm believer in the organization of Activity Days.  One of my best friends in the world joined the church because of that organization, back when we were really young.  I had her over to play, and Activity Days started so I invited her to join.  It turns out that we learned to sing a song in Sacrament at that activity.  So I invited my friend to come to that as well, since she had learned the song.  It was that moment that led her to continue coming to church, and eventually getting baptized.  Now she is married in the temple and has a beautiful family.  She inspires me every day!

And I feel so blessed to now have that opportunity again, to influence the lives of these young girls in Activity Days!  I know that it is where I am supposed to be right now, and I am so grateful for the opportunities I have been given to serve.  And I am so grateful for all of the people out there who are serving full time missions, who inspire me every day and remind me what's most important.

We don't have to be out in a foreign land, set apart as full time missionaries, wearing the badge, to be missionaries and do the wonderful work of the Lord.  As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, we covenant every week to take that name upon us.  We are wearing the badge, and it's important to remember that and to be an example of the believers.  Every day we can find ways to serve others and bring people closer to Christ.  And maybe one day, Brock and I can serve a full time mission together... but until then, here's to member missionary work!  :-)

Of Things That Matter Most

So, Day 29 is put a picture of yourself as a child.  Haha, Day 18 was put a picture of you 10 years ago, which for me and Brock = Childhood.  So, on to, Day 30!  Oh my goodness this 30 days of randomness has come to an end!

And the topic is....  Something you learned about yourself in the last 30 days.

Well, counting back to Day One, this "30 Days" actually took me 114 days.  So I have learned that there are other things to do in life besides blogging?  hahaha.  Just kidding.  We have had a great last 114 days.  This summer has rocked!  And I will tell you something I have learned this summer.

President Dieter F. Uchtdorf gave a wonderful talk last year entitled, "Of Things That Matter Most". It really hit home to me.  My whole life I have always been "go-go-go" nonstop.  Always finding ways to keep myself as busy as possible.  Always ALWAYS stressed.  I was falling into the category Uchtdorf said of people who "think that their self-worth depends on the length of their to-do list. They flood the open spaces in their time with lists of meetings and minutia—even during times of stress and fatigue. Because they unnecessarily complicate their lives, they often feel increased frustration, diminished joy, and too little sense of meaning in their lives."  I heard the talk, thought it was great, but I didn't change anything right away.  I was scared of changing and I didn't know how.  Hence, I still kept busy. 

And this summer, I decided to change that.  I decided that life is too short to rush through it.  I decided to follow President  Uchtdorf's advice that "there is more to life than increasing its speed...focus on the things that matter most."  And I taught myself how to relax.  I quit my unnecessary second job.  I put a cap on how many piano and voice students I would accept.  I organized my schedule so that free time for myself was always part of it.  I made a list of what was most important to me and scheduled out my time to prioritize them.  My priorities became:

Be a good wife
Be a good member of the church
Be happy, stress-free, and relaxed (AKA Aubrey time)
Be a good daughter/sister/family member
Be a good home-maker
Be a good friend
Be a good teacher


I devoted a little bit of time every day to each of those roles in my life, because I decided that in my life, that was what mattered most.  And I will tell you, and Brock will tell you, I am a changed woman!  I feel so good!  And I want to share this advice with the world!  We are never required to run faster than we are able.  This life is about learning and being happy.  I am so grateful for this opportunity I took this summer to self-reflect and really decide what is most important to me in this world.  I am fully, genuinely, happy.  And virtually stress-free.  Whoever is reading this, I invite you to join me in the club!  Take a leap of faith and de-stress your life.  I promise it's worth it.  It's scary, but it's worth it.  You can do it!

Views, Perspective, Self Esteem, Priorities

Day 26 is write how you think other people view you.


But I think, who cares?  I mean, obviously we hope that people enjoy our company and see the good in us.  And we always strive to be kind and serve and make people feel good and important.  But the question "how do others view you" just doesn't seem healthy at all.  For one, you'll never really know.  And for two, all that matters is how you view yourself and how you are in the eyes of the Lord.

Depending on the views of other people is natural.  It's a human instinct to want to be loved and looked up to; and to seek affirmation from the people around you.  But I have recently learned some very important things about the way you should view life, and I think this question provides a great opportunity for me to share that with everyone!

One realization I've had is that nobody is perfect.  I know, I know, it's obvious and everybody knows that.  But yet, even though we all know that, we often still expect it of ourselves and others.  It is in our culture to "strive for perfection."  However, there is a fine line between striving for perfection and expecting perfection.  We should always strive for perfection; we should recognize our weaknesses and work to become better every day.  However, to expect perfection or get down on ourselves when we're not is blasphemous.  Perfection is impossible to achieve in this life.  If any of us were perfect, we wouldn't be here.  That dividing line is crucial to the way we view ourselves and our lives.  And it's also a line that so many people struggle to recognize.  That is why so many people harshly judge others and themselves.  Everyone should just accept that we are all here, humans, brothers and sisters.  We were all sent here for the same purpose, but not to live the same lives.  We are all unique and therefore have to find our own way of improving our lives and finding happiness.  Everyone messes up.  Everyone also does good.  Everyone has emotion.  Everyone loves someone.  If we all could remember those things, everyone would also be happy.

So, instead of ever thinking about what other people think of me, I have decided instead to focus on how I think about others.  Am I loving them?  Am I serving them?  Am I having compassion on them when they are struggling?

And then the other crucial thing to do is prioritize.  Figure out what is most important to you, and what is less important to you.  Make time for the important things, and you will be happy.  I did that this summer; I wrote down my priorities in life: the kind of person I want to be, the things that are important to me, and the time I needed to devote to those things to keep them important.  And I feel so happy.  I am content with my life and confident that I am heading in the right direction.  I am striving for perfection, but I do not expect it of myself.  And I am comfortable with that, because that is all I can do.